


Shaking/Steady

by PompousPickle



Category: IDOLiSH7 (Video Game)
Genre: Ice Skating, Mild Angst, Other, Romance, very mild spoilers, waxing poetic about Nagi again
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-25
Updated: 2019-12-25
Packaged: 2021-02-27 00:28:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,329
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21948190
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PompousPickle/pseuds/PompousPickle
Summary: The snow can bring back many memories, good and bad. But, it can also make new ones too.
Relationships: Rokuya Nagi/Reader
Kudos: 7





	Shaking/Steady

**Author's Note:**

> This was my piece of #i7ss19 this year! I've never done a secret santa before so it was really fun! The prompt I chose was "Nagi/Reader, with sad memories of the snow". I hope this satisifies, @rizelcchi!

Winter was truly a mixed bag in Northmeir. There were many things that were worth loving, and worth remembering. And there were many things that Nagi often rather forget. Haruki had come to the country under the hopes that the fresh air would aide his health. And in many ways, it had. But the mountains grew darker in December, and the nights grew longer and the air became exponentially colder. And Haruki’s hands became weaker and weaker, shaking as they hovered over piano keys. 

He would often turn to Nagi, with a smile that didn’t reach his eyes, and he’d ask if Nagi would like to try to play for a while. Nagi would pluck at the piano, tunelessly, trying to drown out the sounds of Haruki’s hacking cough in the kitchen next to the parlor. 

Sometimes Minami would be there, playing in Nagi’s stead. The song would be sweeter, but his face would grow more and more sour at every key, with every pill that Haruki dropped on the floor, hands too shaky to hold. 

He didn’t tell you this for a long time though. Not until recently. He simply never wanted to worry you. In Japan, Christmas is a time of romance and fantasy. It’s a time for watching the snowfall with old movies playing in the background and going out to restaurants and exchanging presents underneath the lights of a giant Christmas tree in the middle of crowded shopping arcades. 

It always seemed cheesy before you met him, actually. You enjoyed seeing it in fiction, but always thought it would feel weird or over-the-top if it ever happened to you. Nagi has a knack for making it so genuine though. He doesn’t just cling to media tropes as a cheap comfort. He keeps them close to his heart, and he brings you into his heart with them. 

So when he texts you asking you to go skating with him that night, you text back immediately. You grab your scarf, warm pants, and a bright red sweater. You stare at yourself in the mirror, before opting for white. And then green. Before going back to white. You pull on your coat and hat and examine yourself one last time. Nagi thinks you’re a princess no matter what you wear. But that’s precisely why you have to keep him on his toes. Everything about you is to the nines, not a detail out of place.

Except, you realize an hour later, that you forgot your gloves. 

“My angel! Your hands!” He grabs for you while you’re both on the ice. You nearly fall from the mere shift in the balance. Of course Nagi has a natural-born knack for it, and pulls you back up before you can even truly fall. “Your fingers are so cold!” 

You hadn’t quite realized just how cold your hands had become, truthfully. There were other things to do with them. Handing over your tickets to the clerks, tying the laces on your skates, picking yourself off the ice every time you fell down, time and time again. 

But now, encased in the warmth of Nagi’s hands, the feeling is impossible to ignore. He had taken his own gloves off, and tugged you behind a pillar, where prying eyes can’t see his hands encasing your own. It’s become a habit now, ducking the press when things got intimate. You didn’t want to cause a stir and make trouble for Tsumugi and the others. Just for now. Someday, perhaps, it wouldn’t be a problem, and you could hold hands where the whole world could see. 

Right now, it’s fine though. With the warmth of his hands radiating into yours, causing his skin to sting against the cold of your own fingers. Suddenly every part of you feels frozen, and Nagi is smiling down on you in the shadows next to the rink, like the sun. It’s too much, too bright. So you look down at your hands instead. 

That’s when the first snowflake falls, falling right between where your fingers are laced together. Nagi’s smile becomes dimmer. He laces your fingers tighter, eyes suddenly sharp as he holds them still, keeping them from shaking from the cold. Keeping your hands steady and strong in the deepest days of winter. 

“Hey…” You start, trying to think of the right thing to say. The stories of his past come flooding back to you. He told you on a cold night, staring at the night sky from a bench in the middle of the park. The forecast called for snow back then too, and he let out a huff of icy breath, his eyes suddenly far away in a place you couldn’t reach, humming a tune you didn’t recognize. 

“I’m here,” you finally say. “I’m fine.” You smile, and you mean it. The snow is falling a little more steady now, like the iced over memories in the back of Nagi’s mind. He always tells you how even icy memories can melt into sweet. How he can make new memories with his friends, his new family. Even with Minami. 

He seems so certain when he talks about it every other day of the year. But when the snow falls, things change. And his grip tightens, just like it is now. And you realize that he’s the one looking for purchase and strength. 

“You know,” he finally says, breaking his silence. He looks up from your hands, brightened from the warmth shared between you. “The sparkle of the snow really accentuates your beauty, my princess.” 

You laugh. He’s changing the subject, but you can tell he means it. “Does it? Maybe we should get out of here then. I might suddenly become even more beautiful than you. People might start to talk!” You warn playfully. 

Nagi balks, over-the-top and tearing away one hand to cradle his own face, as though feeling for his own striking features to make sure they were still there. “Oh! How terribly cruel!” He holds the dramatic pose, the light from the streets reaching just around the pillar to illuminate him. You bite back another laugh; it’s almost like he summoned a spotlight just for this moment. 

He breaks the pose and is back to your hands, this time leaning over with a dangerous glint in his eyes. “We can’t have that, can we? I won’t give up my title to just anyone, you know. Even Yaotome will fall to my handsomeness, in time.” His smile softens, and pulls at your hands. “Come on now! We must go fast, before the press can catch a glimpse of your stunning features in the snowfall!” 

You can barely keep up with him as he races back to the rental station, and you catch another flash of sadness in his eyes as the snow settles across his blonde hair. But he looks back at you, and laughs away the look in his eyes, and you laugh along with him, eager to follow wherever he might lead.

Eager to make new memories together, like racing to get your skates off. Like chasing after the cab when it almost leaves the two of you on the curb. Like warming up in your apartment, turning on reruns of Magikona as he guesses which figurine you might have bought him for Christmas. 

You didn’t buy him a figure, but he’ll find that out in the morning when you open presents. And you’ll have even more memories by then, slowly melting the cold bitter ones until they all flow together into one steady happy stream. 

He reaches for your hand, late into the night. And he whispers something in a language you haven’t quite mastered. You’re almost certain that he’s thanking you. You think you hear the word “strength”. You think you hear the word “love”. You tighten your fingers around his, with all those feelings returned tenfold. Delivering a silent promise, of music and health and stability, for many snowfalls to come. 

**Author's Note:**

> Merry Christmas once again!! What are the odds that we pulled each other for the Secret Santa, huh? I've never written Reader Insert before, so I hope that this is to your liking. But I really love Nagi and don't often get a chance to write him so I just knew I had to give this prompt a try! Happy holidays again and thank you SO much for your amazing gift to me!!


End file.
